It's Hot...

Wow, it's been a while since my last posting. I kinda feel guilty because this was something that I wanted to update regularly but life kind of got in the way. Here's what hit the fan since I last posted.

On the bright side, Ben passed his army medical officially which is a huge relief since that was the thing that stopped him from joining the last time. He couldn't pass it the first time because of a skin cancer 'problem' in his family - well, really his grandfather. It was pretty stupid, but he made it through this step this time! He did his physical, as well and passed that. The next thing he must to is the interview process which is scheduled to happen on July 12th at 1:00pm (or should I say 13:00!) He's quite nervous though he won't readily admit it. He just gets (understandably) moody, and a bit short. I'm also super stressed about this as well. I really want him to join the Canadian Armed Forces, but at the same time, I wouldn't do it in a million years. All the things that he's looking forward to sound like torture to me: bootcamp - Basic Officer Training Camp - the rigid hierarchical power structure, combat, pushing your physical limits (I'm a bit lazy), etc... all sound like torture. I'm also not excited that he is going to be basically gone for ~3 years. We've done long distance before, but this is twice the length, and he probably won't be phoning me twice a week in 4 hour stints. That sucks. But, he'll be doing something that he's going to love, and it'll be something that he sees meaning in. That's totally worth my perceived stress about it!

Family stuff is all good: My birthday was awesome! Ben made me a marinated lamb shank on the BBQ, with super tasty wine, spicy vegetables, and then we went to Block 1912 for desert. It was awesome! A bunch of my friends took me out for supper (unexpectedly) at the Cheesecake Cafea few days later . It was totally unexpected and one of the best birthday dinners ever. It was awesome to hang out with a bunch of my friends, eat great food, and talk. Mum's birthday was also awesome but a much quiter affair! She doesn't like any fuss.

Work has gone crazy. I feel like I am barely keeping it together, though from the outside I think it looks much more organized. On June 10, Barb's son Kurt (22 y/o) was in a single vehicle car accident in Fort McMurray on the way to a job site - he's a welder. He was eventually found, and airlifted to the U of A hospital. He's paralyzed from the waist down and has to re-evaluate his life. Although this could have been much worse (brain damage, brain dead, quadrapelegic, dead), it is still super stressful for everyone involved. Barb seems to be doing ok at this point, all things considering. I think it stems from the fact that Kurt is being fairly positive about the whole thing. He's planning for the future - how the house will need to be renovated, and considering going back to school, finishing some high school courses, and doing structural engineering. Barb's family isn't handling it as well. Her daughter Courtney, who is Kurt's younger sister, was in denial about the whole thing. She was even picking the worse times to visit him like just after he was airlifted to Edmonton, and right after his surgery. I hope she deals with this better after Kurt gets home (which won't be for weeks and weeks) because then she can start being directly involved in his healing process. I think that this will make it easier for her to digest even though he was always the one looking after her, even now.

Even though my problems seem (and are) minute in comparison, it's still very stressful. I am now the payroll department for upwards of 350 employees, from the president to people who are just starting. I hate math, but now I find myself doing it every minute of my work day - and even worse, with peoples' pay. It sucks and is very stressful. For the last few weeks, I've worked (now from 8 - 5), come home, eaten, gone to bed, etc. I feel like my schooling next year may suffer for this, as I haven't rested since last summer really. This summer so far has been super stressful and it doesn't look like it's getting any better. Last Friday I was so tired, I came home early (Jim sent me home) and slept from 5:30 that night till 7:45 the next morning - with 1/2 hour around 11 pm to eat a pear, brush my teeth, and go to bed. On the bright side, I was entrusted to do payroll for the Excel Society without a blink that an untrained, inexperienced (in payroll at least) summer student is doing it. That makes me feel better! Hopefully I'll get help in the next few weeks because I can't continue this pace without some serious burn-out happing soon.

Unfortunately, this has meant that I've basically ignored my friends since mid May. I feel super guilty about it, but I barely have enough energy to get dressed in the morning (in fact, I've had naps befor 7 am!) let alone, be sociable and non bitchy in the evening. I hope that you all will just sit tight and know that I haven't dropped off the face of the planet, until I regain some energy! I'm slowly getting used to this pace, so hopefully I'll be less of a hermit in the future. If not, you can all kick my ass.

On the strange side, I met a friend that I haven't seen since high school a couple of weeks ago. It was Sarah M, who used to go to Salisbury Composite with me in Sherwood Park. She grew up mostly in Fort Saskatchewan with me, so I know her and her family fairly well. It was really cool to see her and see what's she's up to now. She's been a travelling hippie that last few years. She's been almost all over Canada, and has had a variety of jobs, apartments, and has friends all over the place! It's cool to see that she is really happy and is totally enjoying life! It makes my life seem so different - I've never had culture shock with someone that I grew up with! I bumped into her on the way home from volunteering and from picking up a few things. I recognized her from her walk - she's still super tall and slim, but now has these awesome dread noughts! We talked, exchanged info and she came over on Thursday evening for a few hours to chat. It was awesom! She did a lot of the chatting and told me about some of the things that she's been up to since high school. It was really nice to hear from her. I'm not sure if she's still in Edmonton, as she was planning to go to either Regina or Vancouver fairly soon, but I know that she'll drop by for a chat next time.

On the depressing side, Ben and I went to see "An Inconvenient Truth" at the Garneau theatre on Thursday. EVERYONE MUST SEE IT. I think it would be a very good thing for all of us to see, especially living so close to the sphere of American influence (which isn't all bad, it just is what it is). It follows Al Gore as he travels on a speech-giving trip about climate change, and what's really happening to our planet. It gets fairly depressing in the middle of the movie but it ends on a positive and hopeful note. I am still bummed about it though because I don't have much faith in humanity lately. I think that's because I'm tired, exhausted, and studying Classics gives you a very long view of humanity's actions. I'll post the link on the side bar.

Other than that, my goals in the next few months are to start studying Latin and Greek, and finally apply to grad school. The idea literally scares the living shit out of me though I don't really get that because it seems like an awesome and exciting place to be. I think that I'm afraid of commiting to it and I know that I'm afraid of failure. I've wanted to go to Grad school for YEARS and I'm worried that my marks and abilities aren't up to snuff. But all that stressing is doing me no good so I just have to suck it up and DO IT! It'll be like my end of the year project for my Co-op term. Big and scary at first but while your doing it it's not so bad, then when you're done, you can't believe that you did THAT!

Well, until later!